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{ Dreamer }
Definition:

1. a person who dreams.

2. a person who lives in a world of fantasy; one who is impractical and unrealistic.

3. a person whose ideas or projects are considered audacious or highly speculative; visionary.
{ Marianne }

The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.
It was always you.

{ Past. }

January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 December 2011 January 2012 February 2012 March 2012 April 2012 May 2012 July 2012 October 2012 January 2013 March 2013 July 2013 August 2013 January 2014 September 2014 January 2015 July 2015

{ Saturday, February 23, 2008 }

Well, what's going on in my life. Not much. Perhaps some days I make it through, some days I dont. But BUT I'm refusing to sink into depression. HAHA.

Anyways, yesterday at work was pretty much okay I guess. We're getting more and more normal. Perhaps I was a little messed up cos you HAD to send me some random message to say goodnight -.- Yes, messed me up quite a bit. So in office I tried to be as normal as I can. And I think I suceeded thanks to twin on the phone XD heard "That Justin guy again?" Whatever.

Last night went to church!! For Fish Fry and meeting with Father John Wong. Basically, it was alright. Got a little boring halfway through XD Then me, twin and geraldine went off to Alif's for supper! Oooh yea. Then we bought our alcoholic drinks and walked from Swiss Cottage back to my house while drinking alcohol XD Okay, it was only bacardi breezers. But still. It was a nice walk. And I wished I could have walked it with you. OH NO. Depression. hahaha! Well, I mean it. Perhaps you could walk your next girlfriend there man. OH SHIT. Ouch. Hurt myself. hahah. And then we walked for quite a long time and er...dunno why but I started repeating your name over and over again. LOL. I just miss you can. So I went home and I seriously plopped onto my bed and fell dead asleep. DEAD.

I awoke this morning feeling BAD. Then I had plans to meet SIEWYI!!!!!!!!!! That little girl. And HM for bugis shopping after that but who knows. I meet SIEWYI pass her the uniform. Yes, mine! And then went home only to find out that I need to go my aunty's house -.- So had to cancel!!!!!!!!! OMG. So depressing okay. Then dont know what happened. Think I started it but yea, started msging SIEWYI about you -.- And I realised. No point. Really no point. You don't love me anymore, it's obvious. So even if out of some miracle I wanna get back with you it's pointless. And I know you too well. You've got too much pride to ask me to go back to you even if out of some craziness in your brain you decide to want me back. OH WELLS.

Sucks to be me.

Well, learn something. Dont put your whole heart into something until you're sure it's gonna last. Mmmhmm. Wise words okay. Learn it. Because when you did what I did and what happened to me happens you'll start feeling like shit everyday. I put my brave face on everyday when I go to work everyday I tell myself "Okay, another day. Another battle against depression." I'm lucky enough to have a few thoughtful people who check up on me constantly to see if I've died from emo-ness or if I'm still alive and kicking.

I did it. I messaged you. LOL. With a lame excuse. Oh well. It's something. I miss you. And WTF lah. You dont give a shit. hahah. Pardon the language. And please, I'm suffering from ALOT of pain right now cos I just deleted the later half of all our messages. OH MY GOSH. WTH. WTH. WTF! Damn painful can. 100 over okay. From day 1 till dooms day. =/ ARGH!!!!!!!!! Man, this is bad. Heart ache. LOL.

Nick Lachey - Shades of Blue
Looks like another day,
Slipping through my window shade.
Chasing the dark away,
Seeking into my room again.
Are you a sad and lonely thing,
Come to steal my piece of mind.
The only peace I find,
Is pretending that you're still lying next to me.

So why, why, why
The suns gotta shine, shine, shine.
Why don't it just stay away?
Why do dreams have to fade,
Into all these shades of blue,
Where I wait for you.
Pray love reaches through,
All these shades, shades of blue.
Where you close your eyes,
Feel me by your side.
I will wait for you,
In all these shades of blue.

Thinking back on my mistakes,
I can't undo all the days that I misused.
I thought you that you always stay.
Its hard to face the simple truth,
That time brings no relief,
And time is all you need you said,
Had to go clear out your head.
While you're trying to decide if you'll come back to me.

Why, why, why
Do we have to cry cry cry?
Tell me why this has to be,
Why don't you give into me?
Baby...all these shades of blue,
Where I wait for you.
Pray love reaches through,
All these shades, shades of blue.
Where you close your eyes,
Feel me by your side.
I will wait for you,
In all these shades of blue

Why did you have to leave?
Why did you have to set me free?
Why did you have to go?
Why did you have to leave?
Why did you have to set me free?
Why did you have to go?

Baby...all these shades of blue,
Where I wait for you.
Pray love reaches through,
All these shades, shades of blue.
Where you close your eyes,
Feel me by your side.
I will wait for you,
In all these shades of blue
Here in all these shades of blue.

The Academy Is - Everything We Had
You were the only face I'd ever known
I was the light from the lamp on the floor
And only as bright as you wanted me to be
But, I am no gentleman, I can be a prick
And I do regret more than I admit
You have been followed back to the same place
I sat with you drink for drink
Take the pain out of love and then love won't exist


Everything we had, everything we had
Everything we had, everything we had
Is no longer there

It was the only place I'd never known
Turned off the light on my way out the door
I will be watching wherever you go
through the eyes of a fly on the wall
You have been followed back to the same place
I sat with you drink for drink
Take the pain out of love and then love won't exist

Everything we had, everything we had
everything we had, everything we had
Is no longer there, longer there

You saw for yourself, the way it played out
For you, I am blinded
For you, I am blinded, for you

I am no gentleman, I can be a prick
And I do regret more than I admit
You have been followed back to the same place
I sat with you drink for drink
Take the pain out of love and then love won't exist

Everything we had, everything we had
(You have been followed, you have been followed)
Everything we had, everything we had
(You have been followed, you have been followed)
Everything we had, everything we had
(You have been followed, you have been followed)
Everything we had...

I'll be with you wherever you go
through the eyes of a fly on the wall

I'd pray and I'd beg "Please, dont go." If I weren't so sure that you dont love me anymore. For you I am blinded.



{ fin }