{ Dreamer }

The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.
It was always you.

January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 December 2011 January 2012 February 2012 March 2012 April 2012 May 2012 July 2012 October 2012 January 2013 March 2013 July 2013 August 2013 January 2014 September 2014 January 2015 July 2015

Want. Its a want. Why is it a want? It shouldnt even be a want.

I feel like shit.

Like I'm dying. Its like I can watch mtv and cry again.

WTF. Screw up my life like that.

Heart, I hate you.

and I realise the problem with guys. SELF ABSORBED. They just wanna talk about themselves.

I have to go to church tomorrow for children's lit. Why? Because twin wants to show me his new crush.

Justin Ng gave me the advice of "Give it up. Forget it. Pick me!"

Every other guy said "I'm bored"

Well, go to hell. aybe that'll be fun and not so boring. I'm pissed and broken. You're bored. I'm supposed to entertain you? go to hell. I mean it. Go kill yourself. Throw yourself off the building. Call me a drama queen. Whatever. You dont livethis life. You have no freaking idea how drama it can get.

OH OH ultimate "My name is the patrion saint of alter servers and first communion." OMG, get a life. I'm in no mood at all. Good for you dude but I'm sorta feeling five hundred thousand feet underground.

Its like Marianne, who gives a shit about how you're feeling? I have to do things because it makes other people happ. I need to meet someone's new crush. I have to be someoe's friend. What about what I have to do for myself. What. WTF. Its seriously so assholic. I feel like shit. Seriously. Everytime something good happens in life, something bad happens too.

Let's see. When there was James there was Jem and HM. When there was Ice, there was every other girl. I dont even wanna talk about soe f-ed up guy. Now when there's this there's all that.

I dont get it. I dont get anything. Its always a dead end road I drive myself into. Why did I fall so fast? I have no idea. But yeah. This was really something I wanted. BADLY. Someone who fnally made me wow. So much more than the f-ed up guy. And this happens. It just makes life seem so pointless. Makes life feel so hopeless. Makes everything look so bleak. So fragile. Make me feel like I'm some big fat ass joke hung up high for the world to laugh at. That's what it feels like. Like the whole world has a joke and i dont know what it is only to realise the joke's on me.

What is it. Seriously. Is it just me? Is it just me who attracts controversy and drama? Is it just me that makes people hate me. Is it just me that the world hates me? What is it. WHAT. URGH.

Its so stifling when I cant put my finger on things.

{ fin }

Hello world (: I'm feeling kind of better today.

I played guitar almost the whole day. I'm thinking of writing songs. LOL. Simple chords so simple songs. See how (:

Oh, anyway, I think I have great friends. I just told Justing Ng about the whole black panther situation and he said he'll try to see what he can find out and so we're texting now. After all they know each other so yeah. He said he didnt like people bad mouthing his friends. LOL. So sweet right (: I have great friends. I mean they never hesitate to stand up for me when I'm right and they never doubt what I say. I love them because tey know who I really am and they're so sure about what sort of person I am that nothing can make them doubt my character (:

Anyways, I bathed for an hour today! LOL. Okay, first half an hour I was just sitting under the running water. Just needed to think things through you know? I thought about James and Ice. Then black panther. haha. Ah well. Black Panther is one person I'll never get. That's for sure.

Woman's message made me laugh like mad. She wants to change lion to white tiger because its endangered species. So funny XD I laughed like mad when I read the mssage luh! :D

So, just another week and I'm so done with it. And of course THURSDAY'S COMING!!! (: Tanning and PLAY; I dont think anythingcan get more exciting than that EXCEPT FOR JASON MRAZ'S CONCERT WHICH IS 33 DAYS AWAY!! :D WOOHOOOO MANZXSZXSZXSZ! LOL.

I'd go straight for black panther, seriously but since derek see decided to be an asshole I'll go GAY. hahaha. No luh. I'm still pissed okay. Like really. TSK.

Anyways, for the fun of it. A really sweet song (:

& baby, just say yes (:

{ fin }

TODAY SUCKED BIG TIME. I was so looking forward to today but it turned out all wrong.

If you wanna say something say it my face; damn it.

Anyway, its pretty sickening what sore losers do. DUDE, get over it man. Everyone gets dumped at least once in their lives. So get over it already. GET A FREAKING LIFE. Quit ruining mine. Seriously.

So fucked up. You piss me off. Why did I even get involved with you. You make my life a living hell. GO TO HELL. Read it. FUCK OFF. I'm serious. If I ever see you in school I might just go up and slap you in the bloody face. You're so immature. I dont get it. I didnt ate you but HELLO you just made me hate you today. Because I guess you like killed the one and only thing that I really wanted in my life after a pretty long time. The only joy I had. You had to take it away with your immaturity.

And yea, I'm serious. I was really hoping for something. Like I was happy to just keep it to myself for a long time because it was different. It felt different. It felt like Iceall over again sort of thing. Or James. Whichever one. But yeah, it felt real. Then it gets crushed just like that. URGH.

Heart; you've failed her yet again,
Leaving her with nothing but pain.
It is just another hole,
But one that leaves her never whole.
She watched the rose wither and die,
Because of something built on lies.
Facades is the name of her game;
Masquerade is her middle name.
Dancing alone in the world,
She watches as her own rath unfurls.
Heart; you've let her down again,
Rushing into love with no gain.
She feels her whole world crashing down,
Killing her without a sound.
The damage done cannot be undone;
The scars you left just having fun.

Anyways, I'm happy for woman (: She's having fun in he life whoohoo. LOL. Congratulations woman! All the best! (: GO FOR IT! ;D And thanks for listening to me rant non stop. I'm also happy I got an award from Mr Eugene. Its called "The most talkative person" award. LOL. But I think he's nice (: Very encouraging at least (: Good guy!

B, you still look good in my eyes and you know what? That crush on you, its staying and not going away somehow. I dont know why.

& explain to me; this conspiracy against me.

{ fin }

Hello world (:

HAHA, had a great day with woman today. LOL. Doing the social psych poster. Yeah, why cant all projects be pair work? We'd do so well XD So proud of our poster please! Its like beautiful! With mosaics on it (: WOOHOO. HAHA.

Anyways, kenn and gang joined us (:

OOH, and ourspace was overloaded with eyecandy today. B than XY LOL. Seriously, B's hot okay. DAMN hot. Seeing him tomorrow! BE JEALOUS WOMAN! HAHAH. He's nice to me what LOL. I really hope the other dude from my cats class didnt hear anything about it luh. HAHA, if not OMG tomorrow he'll avoid me like shit. HOTNESS REDEFINED.

Anyways, had a little weird dream about none othe than Ice.

I dreamt we went out together and that she drove! We went to some air conditioned coffee shop to eat GREEN BEANS (-.-) Then when we were on our way out we saw RACHEL and guess what? I asked her "Your girlfriend wont get jealous or angry meh?" And she's like "No luh. Break already." LOL. Nice right? WRONG. Cos I went back to sleep again after that and I continued the dream.

Me, Rachel and Sherina together with Cindy were like at that same coffee shop to like discuss about Ice and then she appeared and started scolding me! Like "Just cos you're my ex doesnt mean you have the right to go meet all my other ex-es okay. So what are you all? best friends now?" LOL. And then she saw Cindy and she started asking "Are you the one who talk to me on msn the other day? Must be your idea right? (Turning to me)" LOL. WTH. WHY SCOLD ME? WHY NOT THE OTHER TWO HUH. Ass. Anyways, yeah. Weird dream. HAHA.

My two drinks last night! (:

The live band! Great drummer and great vocalists!

LOL. Our proud poster! (: Isnt it BEAUTIFUL?! HAHHA!

Adele - Best for last
Wait, do you see my heart on my sleeve?
It's been there for days on end and
It's been waiting for you to open up
Just you baby, come on now
I'm trying to tell you just how
I'd like to hear the words roll out of your mouth finally
Say that it's always been me
That's made you feel a way you've never felt before
And I'm all you need and that you never want more
Then you'd say all of the right things without a clue
But you'd save the best for last
Like I'm the one for you

You should know that you're just a temporary fix
This is not rooted with you it don't mean that much to me
You're just a filler in the space that happened to be free
How dare you think you'd get away with trying to play me

Why is it everytime I think I've tried my hardest
It turns out it ain't enough cause you're still not mentioning love
What am I supposed to do to make you want me properly?
I'm taking these chances and getting away
And though I'm trying my hardest you back to her
And I think that I know things may never change
I'm still hoping one day I might hear you say
I make you feel a way you've never felt before
And I'm all you need and that you never want more
Then you'd say all of the right things without a clue
But you'd save the best for last
Like I'm the one for you

You should know that you're just a temporary fix
This is not rooted with you it don't mean that much to me
You're just a filler in the space that happened to be free
How dare you think you'd get away with trying to play me

But, despite the truth that I knowI find it hard to let go and give up on you
Seems I love the things you do
Like the meaner you treat me the more eager I am
To persist with this heartbreak and running around
And I think that I know things may never change
I'm still hoping one day I might hear you say
I make you feel a way you've never felt before
And I'm all you need and that you never want more
And we'll say all of the right things without a clue
And you'll be the one for me and me the one for you

& a B for me; an A for woman! (: I like my B better.

{ fin }

Hello people (:

WHOO, Okay. Today isnt that bad a day I guess (:

Didint get my bag in the end ): But yeah, need it before next thursday!

Returned that girl her phone. Sheturned out to be more punk rock than I thought she'd be. LOL. Woman said she was staring at me as we left. OMG. SCAAAARY!

So after school woman went home and I waited at the bus stop only to realise that they were meeting at cheers! XD DAMN FUNNY. Met a new gil called Sharon. She's so sweet and hilarious luh! (: We then went off! Marc left us halfway ): But yeah. Twin joined us! (: Went to Singapore Flyer's Popeye to eat.

FUNNY INCIDENT.
OMG, I went to the toilet and there was this damn hot bung who was just coming out of her cubicle and so I was looking at her but she was on the phone so I went into my cubicle and was about to close the door when I saw her peeping into my cubicle! LOL. WTH. Damn cute please. We were the only two in the toilet and she was still around when I came out of the toilet but still on the phone. A smile is all we exchanged (: GOOD LOOKING PLEASE.

There's like 4-5 bungs there! Then we went to LOVE THE WORLD pub where there was a catholic band! OMG; damn nice please! Shared a Hennesy Cognea and a Peach Mojito with twin. Only thing about it was that twin was being a pain in the ass telling me what drinking was all about. "It's not about finishing the most amount but learning to appreciate the drink" HELLO, just drink the drink!

Anyways, cam-whored once again! Photos when I get it (: WHOOPEE. It was damn fun please :D Cabbed home AGAIN with Viv and twin. Oh yea, me and viv got a few scandalous photos. LOL. OMG.

Yes, and saw EYECANDY today! (: DAMN CUTE PLEASE. She looked at me also luh. Like look back. URGH. I seriously like her luh. LOL. I cannot believe two people can look so alike! ):

& can you see my heart on my sleeve?

{ fin }

Okay, damn exciting news (:

I'm getting leggings online LOL. No luh.

I lost $21 to my grandpa playing bun-luck -.- NOPE.

I'M GOING TO PLAY EXT THURSDAY! (: Lesbian night so should be pretty exciting :D About time huh. HAHA, see what we'll find :D

So exciting. PLUS JASON MRAZ IS JUST CREEEEEPING UP ON US ALL! WOOHOO!

So here's what I seriously need. ACCESSORIES! LOL. Just to spice things up (:

Oh, I watched CJ7 this morning! SO FRIGGING CUTE. I remembered the first time it came out in the movies it was last year's chinese new year. Cos we wanted to watch a movie and couldn't decide whether to watch the JAY CHOU show, CJ7 or some singapore show. LOL. Ah well. We watched her brother's show in the end.

& 'Meh, my psp with you right?'

{ fin }

HAPPY CNY! (:

I just lost $18 to my grandfather. WELL DONE. LOL. Cannot describe how SWAY I am with money this year. SERIOUSLY.

Anyways, my cousin brought her boyfriend. Not too bad uh (: Pretty decent fellow. HAHA. His name is Daniel. Alright luh. HAH.

Food is delicious.

PLAY next thursday is gonna be awesome! Lesbian night man; I mean. Come on luh. What could be better right? Free drinks for ladies? MAYYYYBE (:

Alright, more gambling tomorrow. I'm gona join the song composition thingy (: MIGHT luh. HAHA.

& cant you see my heart on my sleeve?

{ fin }

TSK.

Yesterday was pretty fun (: Spend the day cleaning up the house and my tee shirts came! PRETTY (: Seriously! HAHA.

I painted my nails for the first time. LOL. Black because I refused any other colour. Maybe I should get green. Like Steffy XD

Anyways, my voice is still not back sadly ): And cny is creeping up already which completely sucks. Ah wells. My new bedsheet rocks too by the way. LOL.

We went to the market in the middle of the night to get things we need for a yummylicious feast :D WHOO. HAHA.

Okay, thought I'd have stuff to write about but I guess not XD

They say I'm insane; they say I mad.
For loving you when you dont love me back.
But they dont know what we had.
They dont know what I lack.
They try to judge me; tell me I'm wrong
Saying I'm a fool to even fall for you.
They dont know why I wrote this song.
They dont know what you do.

They can say whatever they like;
Try to tell me I'm walking on a wire.
But they dont know the battles I fight,
They dont know the reasons I cry.
Because they dont know just what you mean to me.
And you dont know just what you mean to me.
So go on and say whatever you like.
But they dont know what I think of inside.

Its having your arms around me;
A safe haven where I can sleep.
Its having you whisper in my ear;
And tell me everything I need to hear.
Its having your smile to smile back at;
The one thing that drives me mad.
Its having your lips on my lips;
The feeling of your beautiful kiss.

So try; time and again.
To tell me I'm living in a dream.
To say that its the end.
And there's no point in wanting to scream.
They say "Let it go;
You foolish girl"
But they dont know;
Your eyes and your world.

& your eyes and yur world (:

{ fin }

Rock climbing was a wall of emotions. LOL. I finally climbed in 1234567890987654321 days of not climbing. HAHA. WHOOPEE! Scary too! TSK.

What I wanted to say was that if I was still with you I'd ask you to talk some sense into that friend of your's. Then again; birds of a feather flock together.

OH, and they're finally mailing out my shirts! ARGH, cant wait! Hope I can fit in XD OOOH.

Went to westmall today. Saw Cheng Yee's new accesory! A BOYFRIEND. LOL.

Oh, and Edmund asked me to go PLAY with him this saturday but I cant! So I said next saturday! And since shorty wants to go too I'm asking her along and Geraldina's coming too I think. -.- Ah wells. So exciting. Virgin experience at a gay club. How cool is that. 2009 has got to be the most interesting year man! HAHA.

AND OF COURSE, meeting my DEAREST SIEWYI next sunday for shopping at arab street! Such a sweetheart wants to make my accesories for me! (: LOVE YOU GIRL! And I'm really fine! I promise I'll be noisy again soon! Its my sexy hoarse voice!

Yes, so I'm a busy person.

31st Jan 2009 - PLAY!

1st Feb 2009 - DATE WITH SIEWYI! ;D

5th Feb 2009 - TANNING WITH WOMAN AND MOVIE! INKHEART! (:

6th Feb 2009 - SECOND DRINKING SESSION AT IRISH PUB WITH TARCI & KENN (tentative still though)

14th Feb 2009 - KENNY ROGERS WITH WOMAN :D

****5th MARCH 2009 - JASON MRAZ LIVE IN CONCERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LOL. Thank God Chinese New Year's coming. Cash needed asap! HAHA. I also need to get new bag, new sandals, better leggings and confidence! LOL.

Anyways, cant wait for JASON MRAZ to come man. 41 more days! (:

Wan, Khai, we're gonna have a BLAST! OH! Timo's going too! TIMO OF HILLGROVE 4E3 2006! XD WHOOTS!

Okay, damn high now for no reason. Still doing CATS and gonna study stats tomorrow. Work is never ending.

Singapore's education system; what the hell are you doing to our lives? LOL.

'And I hear your words that I made up
You say my name like there could be an us
I best tidy up my head I'm the only one in love
I'm the only one in love'

& without me knowing; you've turned my heart to stone

{ fin }

Its over at long last.

I guess I owe woman an apology. Its not that I wasn't on your side. It was just that I was one against three. I was minority. My vote didnt count. So sorry woman!

I think rage makes people say horrible things. I realised today. TSK. I realised too that I'm tired shit. Tired because this group has been nothing but a trial. Nisha says she's a born optimist. I'm so sure she meant pessimist. She never fails to make me feel like we did shitty-ly. I shant comment about the guys because the guys just do their stuff in a whole new different way.

Happy stuff.

Before we ended the presentation, Emily said that our group is so hilarious when we try to be serious -.- WHAT?! LOL

43 DAYS TO JASON MRAZ!!! I FEEL IT COMING CLOSER AND CLOSER MAN.

Oh, many days of no eyecandy ): Guess it doesnt matter.

Adele - Cold Shoulder

You say it's all in my head

And the things I think just don't make sense

So where you been then?

Don't go all coy

Don't turn it round on me like it's my fault

See I can see that look in your eyes

The one that shoots me each and every time

You grace me with your cold shoulder

Whenever you look at me I wish I was her

You shower me with words made of knives

Whenever you look at me I wish I was her

These days when I see you

You make it look like see-through

Do tell me why you waste our time

When your heart ain't admitting you're not satisfied

You know I know just how you feel

I'm starting to find myself feeling that way too

When you grace me with your cold shoulder

Whenever you look at me I wish I was her

You shower me with words made of knives

Whenever you look at me I wish I was her

Time and time again, I play the role of fool

(Just for you)

Even in the daylight when you ?

(I see you)

Try to look for things I hear but our eyes never find

Though I do know how you play

You grace me with your cold shoulder

Whenever you look at me I wish I was her

You shower me with words made of knives

Whenever you look at me I wish I was her

You grace me with your cold shoulder

Whenever you look at me I wish I was her

You shower me with words made of knives

Whenever you look at me I wish I was her

Amazing song. Amazing lyrics. Amazing voice. Means so much!

& when its time to let go; let go.

{ fin }

HELLO WORLD.

MARIANNE CHAN IS DYING. IP IS KILLING HER. LOL.

My voice is disappearing, present what? LOL.

Anyways, today was fun although I expected it to be not fun since woman wasn't around but hey, we had fun! XD Stress levels were high but Nisha's funny walk and all (:

Worked till 9pm before we left ):

Tomorrow should be alright I hope. We've practiced!

Okay, time to go.

Such an amazing song! (:

& whenever you look at me; I wish I was her.

{ fin }

Feeling shitty. Not just because I have a leaking nose, half a voice and a head banging headache. Seeing his best friend everywhere I go makes me feel shitty. Tell me why? It isnt my fault but I just feel like its my fault even when I know its not.

URGH. Yeah, I have not seen him in school since we broke up. Its weird I guess. We used to bump into each other when we were still together. Just weird.

I know what's bothering me. It was why I decided we're from different worlds and all but it was also becauseof the question I kept asking myself. TSK. So it is sort of my fault? Partly I guess.

Whatever. Its SO over. I'm COMPLETELY out of his life like he wanted it to be so yea (: SO BE IT.

I'm going off to complete OB like I'm supposed to hours ago.

I cannot wait for my new clothes to arrive. LOL (-.-)

WHOOPEE. 44 DAYS TO JASON MRAZ YOO! ITS SO CLOSE CAN ALMOST GRASP IT! :D oh man, imagine when it gets down to like single digits. HAHA, i'll go mad luh! :D

So here's the latest song I'm crazy about XD

It's RA RA RASPUTIN by ABBA! (: DAMN CUTE SONG :D

& lover of the russian queen (:

{ fin }

I'm so freaking sick. ):

Anyways, bought three new tee shirts online! (: AND a few more dresses and stuff online too! All coming my way right this instant so yipee! :D

LOL. I have decided to try to learn to accesorise myself. HAHA, no more plain jane yeah. (: About time anyway. BUT ABSOLUTELY NO MAKE UP STILL! Refuse to put on make up. Dont ask me why. HAHA.

This one went out of stock ):

So I got this one instead (:

I'm advertising for them:

http://www.vogue--boutique-tee-shirt.blogspot.com/

because they have AMAZING tee shirts for both girls and guys! (: Go buy NOW. LOL.

{ fin }

ONE WORD: BLOG SHOPPING! XD

SO EXCITING, NOW I KNOW WHY EVERYONE'S AT IT!

OKAY, 46 DAYS TO JASON MRAZ! (:

& crazy little thing called love :D

{ fin }

HELLO WORLD.

Feels like I've been missing for quite some time. Okay, maybe a day but still! HAHA.

Well yesterday I finally went for cats and s&w again after so long. OMG, absailing is freaking fun! LOL. Okay, so we climbed and all then the F-U-N part came in the night man! (:

Went to this Irish Pub near Dhoby Gaut area. OH MAN, it was damn cool please! We sat down just me, Viv, Tarci and Matty! :D We odered drinks and first round of drinks were on Tarci! :D WOOTS man. KILKENNY ROCKSSSSSSZXSZXZXSZXZ! Haha, yeah man. Then me and Tarci were the fastest to finish our drinks so we both ordered another pine of Guiness Stout. OMG, that made me pee like 5 million times. HAH. Viv was pretty scary in the sense that she was feeling sick after one pine of drinks and we went to the toilet and she had to squat like twice! Damn scary! Everyone was like "Are you okay?" LOL. And I always thought that Viv was a drinker!

Anyways, we sort of found out alot about each other that night! (: And they sorta found out about me and Viv bing from an all girls school for 5 freaking years said my vibe was pretty strong. LOL. Cant help it! She was like "You're bi right?". LOL.

Anyways, I was proud of myself. Drinking one pine of Kilkenny and one pine of Guiness and still not drunk (: We went to centrepoint for supper! MAC'S! (: NUGGETS! HAHA and I got home at like 12.30am. Damn fun day!

6 Feb, TARCI! HAHA.

Ooh, okay. So for today I stayed home and did housework. Cleared my room for CNY(woman's "favourite" festive season!) and and erm, I did the whole paper marche thing! Turned out kind of nice!

So we had dinner to sort of celebrate my grandfather's birthday! And my baby couson is so freaking cute! XD TSK. So great 2 days (:

Damn cute right? OMG. HAHA, cant wait for him to grow a little bigger! (: His name is YIXUN! :D

& yes, you were the centre of attraction wherever you went. I remember.

{ fin }

Hello people (:

There was a note outside the classroom that said "Be cafeful." CAFE FUL! OMG, we didnt notice what was wrong till Nisha said it!

Anyways, exciting news. 50 DAYS TO JASON MRAZ AND AND WE GOT TICKETS ALREADY YOOO! (:

Freaking exciting! (: Yes people, stare and be jealous! OMG, cant frigging wait! (:

Something interesting happened in church!

Yes, I do know these people. And I was there some girl in a skirt with her back facing the camera (: LOL. So damn funny luh. We like partying!

& pikachu's damn good looking but eyecandy is so cute and reminds me of you.

{ fin }

& that's the day I saw her (:

{ fin }

Seriously, I'm getting tired of this life.

I dont get my parents. Why dont they see things from my point of view instead of their own instead? I mean, I know my ways are always different from their's and I'm 100% not like ANY one in my family but cant they try to understand just a little?

I'm different. They're so used to living in their sheltered life. Afraid of stepping out of the daily routine, afraid of doing things differently, afraid of anything that's new. Afraid to be adventurous. That's why I'm different. I cant stand having a routined life. Who says I have to eat breakfast at 9am every morning? Why cant I eat it at 10am instead? Simple things like that I dont get to do. Why cant they let go of the reigns and let me roam free. Let me learn things the hard way. Let me experience new things. Let me do what I want and get hurt if I need to. Let go of the reigns! I'm still alive after all the rebellious things I've done right?

I know they dont like Jason mraz and his music but I do and I love his music. My dad said I was being childish to want to go for his concert and pay so much when he's already rich. WTH, its not about being childish. Its about giving your daughter the SMALL bit of enjoyment that you allow to your daughter. Why? Because music is the only thing that's been keeping me alive all these years. Its the only spot of freedom I have in my life. Its the only thing in life that helps me escape from reality. It allows my mind to interprete it in whatever way I want to. Especially Jason's music with scat and all.

So someone tell me why they wanna take away everything from me. Even the small little things that I own like my music and the concerts I want to go to?

I dont give a shit. I'm paying the money and going for Jason's concert no matter what. I'm a rebel so yeah. I just dont understand why they have to rain on my beginnings.

& thanks for dampening my spirits; rebellion starts in 53 days.

{ fin }

JASON MRAZ TICKETS OUT TOMORROW! I AM SO GONNA GET THEM ASAP! 9AM IN THE MORNING LET'S BOOK THREE TIKETS MAN THREE TICKETS. I CANT FREAKING WAIT.

& eyecandy found :D One word; cute.

{ fin }

BOOOO!

Today's been a pretty weird day. I went to school to help the HMS Ambassador thingy. Ms Fong is a very very nice teacher! (: HAAH, anyways didnt know ANYONE there. Thanks to braces boy for ditching me last minute. TSK.

So there I was facing barriers cos they all had their own cliques and I was so alone ): Luckily Kenn came and weiting and I started to get happier XD LOL, it was a pretty alright job I guess. Just a little tiring cos we had to run from 3rd floor to 5th floor and back down to 3rd floor. But it was fun meeting new people! (:

Anyways, I madea new friend. Her name is Janelle or however you spell it (: She's cute and tanner than me ): And I think she's a really nice girl :D

Met this Hillgrove girl too. She says she recognises me! OMG, too popular lol. Hillgrove days, ah well. Emceeing and all (: Happier days in some ways.

I also met a few people like Marc and HuiShan who told me she met Derek and who pretended not to hear when I told her we broke up. LOL. TSK. AND saw that best friend of his AGAIN. Whoo, but I'm brave. I walked past them like I dont even know them or didnt even see them (: LOL. AND Deon came to HMS when everything was finished! XD And he kept saying "I need the toilet." How dumb is that uh!

WOMAN! WANNA GET HENNA TOMORROW? AT LSCT!! FREEEEE! XD

OH, and we ALL skipped S&W today XD

AND Kenn is a nice friend to walk me to the bus stop! Thanks kenn! Shaiz is a nice guy to buy me a drink (:

OH, and Jia Wen's friend Juo Wi was in the room today and he screamed my name LOL. Embarrasing cos I was in a dumb mood and I took like some huge breath in. LOL. He laughed his head off -.-

All in all it was an experience I guess. Working with new people and old. Meeting all sorts of kids XD

I'm waiting for 5th march; hurry come!

OMG OMG, BREAKING NEWS! JASON MRAZ TICKETS ARE OUT! $145 FOR FRONT ROW SEATS AND ONINE BOOKING STARTS AT 9AM 12 JAN I SHALL WAKE UP AT 4 AM TO WAIT TO BOOK IT XD LOL. OKAY, 8AM. WHOOO! SO EXCITING SO EXCITING OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG. I'M GOING MAAD. LOL. JASON JASON JASON JASON! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

& you're still the one who makes me go mad over you (:

{ fin }

I think people tend to forget I have feelings and emotions too. Even my own family so what the hell do you want me to do huh. I still feel so freaking stifled. I'm tired. Nope, I'm exhausted. I'm stifled. For the first time I'm planning the next step. Yeah, APPARENTLY THERE WAS NO PLAN AT ALL.

Why doesnt anyone understand that its the circumstances its not that I dont want things to go the way its supposed to so I'm sorry if it doesnt go certain way. Nothing goes smoothly all the time. That's life. I'm used to it. That's EXACTLY why I dont give a damn about plans. Yea, I dont plan. I dont keep a freaking SCHEDULE where I put everything in and my mind driftsf from one land to the next. It never remembers dates or schedules. Plans. It does NOT remember plans. Yeah, AS IF I would rather not spend my time at Sentosa enjoying myself. AS IF I would not rather have dinner with woman. AS IF I dont have anything else better to do than ruin everyone else's plan for themselves and for me.

Yeah, I'm letting out steam because it really is damn irritating the whole day. THE WHOLE DAY. I dont show it but yea. I'm sorry, its not AS IF its so easy to embarrass yourself by falling in front of a whole big bunch of people and acting helpless and you know they all think you're pathetic. You try it and tell me how it feels. Well, guess what? You dont even wanna try it because you've got some high pride up in your brain. "So long and you did four people only?" WTF. You try it and tell me. I bet you wont even get one.

Okay, I feel better now. I'm going drinking soon. I think I need and deserve it. I'm sorry for the language but yeah. FLOWERY HUH. lol.

I guess cindy isnt the only one who wants this sem to just end. Cos if it doesnt end soon I might just go mad soon. Its over doing it.

Where the heck did my adventures go?

THANK GOD I HAVE CYA (: Really. I'm going drinking with Tarci and Matty :D YIPEEEE. I really think I deserve it.

And woman, its really okay. Its who you are so yeah (: Really. PEACE :D

Okay, enough. Anger must go NOW.

Just remember, even the most tolerant people have limits and you wont like it when the limit is reached.

And yes, honestly, this post is shit. So whatever. Its called words of hatred. LOL. I'm feeling wayyy better now.

& when I'm happy, you're sad. When you're happy, I'm happy. When I'm sad, you're happy. Its what I was willing to do for you and what you weren't willing to do for me.

{ fin }

Hello people! XD

Today's been a pretty fun day! 1st day ofopen house and its soooo crowded I'm surprised! OH, and my face didnt go into the brochure! YESSS! (: That's like such a relief! XD

Okay, so rewind to yesterday's CYA! OMG, I just love that bunch of people to bits. Although I'm so freaking new there but they treat me like they've known me forever and everyone's just so nice there and willing to welcome you into their group. We're like one HUGE family. (: LOVE IT. Seriously. LOL. We celebrated JOHN TAN'S birthday :D HAHA, we had CHAMPAIGN CAKE OKAYYYY. It was delicious then we cleared the room and then went to serene centre for island creamery bt the sales girl is sooooo not friendly we decided to go Mac's instead! Went there to eat nuggets and stuff then cabbed home with VIVANA! LOL. Really had a BLAST!

What CYA means (:

Busy lighting the cake!

NICE YUMMYLICIOUS CAKE!

Me, Marc, Viviana and Dinis!
LOL. Viv -.-
Shy birthday boy XD
Blown out cake
The bunch I love (:
Three generations of CYA!
Smash (:
SPASTICS!
PRESENTING DOROTHY! She knows her music damn well!
Unglamourosity that is Marc XD
DINIS!

GREEDY SHOT.

ISAAAAAAC! More greedy shots XD
Emphasis : Cake!
LOL. greedy as me (:
VIVIANA!

Today I learnt that it is not easy to use crutches! Armpits hurt like maaaad. ): I think its quite embarrassing. I spent my whole day today lying to people and humiliating myself. LOL. Here's the deal. I bandaged up my own leg and used crutches from JOEL to walk around school with Lanze and Joel following close behind. So like I'll pretend to drop a crutch when walking and see if anyone bothers to help me up and like see how much they're willing to help. OMG, damn funny. I felt super bad cheating their feelings okay! They were all so nice (: HAHA, but its damn embarrassing luh. Like crutches also cant hold properly! Ngee Ann is a horrible place for crutches. Get a wheelchair if you cant use your legs! XD

LOL. Went home the same way with woman (: No friends for her tomorrow ): LOL.

My 2nd fake (: LOL. How patetic do I look man.

& what are we doing? We are turning into dust.

{ fin }