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{ Dreamer }
Definition:

1. a person who dreams.

2. a person who lives in a world of fantasy; one who is impractical and unrealistic.

3. a person whose ideas or projects are considered audacious or highly speculative; visionary.
{ Marianne }

The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.
It was always you.

{ Past. }

January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 December 2011 January 2012 February 2012 March 2012 April 2012 May 2012 July 2012 October 2012 January 2013 March 2013 July 2013 August 2013 January 2014 September 2014 January 2015 July 2015

{ Sunday, February 24, 2008 }

Did I mention I'm refusing to get depressed?

I deleted all the messages today. It hurts lah but I know if I ever want to get over you like ASAP I'm going to have to do that sooner or later. Today, I stayed sober and un-depressed for SIEWYI's sake. She sent me this really ultra super nice message and I told her for her sake I'm going to be alright. Going to church always helps. I know what route I have to take now. What I really want now is to just focus on adjusting to poly life and study hard. I'm moving on. REALLY. I'll hurt but like I said once I've hurt fully I should recover after that.

So today is a good day I guess. haha. At least I got through the day (: I'm really not interested in work anymore. haha! So I got a date with my mom on wednesday. HALFDAY FOR ME! Yayness! XD Gonna buy new clothes because I'm gonna need LOADS in poly okay. LOL. Attract guys, lecturers and bungs. OMG. I'm freaking kidding. I'm going to be a nerd in poly and get good good grades. I CANNOT waste another shitty year over relationships and stuff. See, my plan now is to stop looking for love and let love find me.

OH YES. I thanked God today for giving amazing friends. REALLY. I feel that I've got loads of great friends who are so concerened for me and constantly trying to cheer me up :) Thanks to everyone who tried, it worked. I'm cheerful as can be now. I love you guys loads!!!!

So I am leaving Maybank in 2 weeks time. Please remind me to bring my camera on the last day! I MUST have a picture with every single person! haha. Most anyways. It's kind of sad to leave after staying on for so long. But I guess, it's time to move on. Life doesnt stop after a break up.

YES. I have a new phone!!!!!!!! Samsung (mmhmm, again) F330 live loud edition :) Love it can. Now I'm just waiting for my 2GB sd card then can load like millions of songs into my phone! YAYNESS. Cant you feel the optimism radiating from me in this post? hahaha! You haven seen this Marianne in a while have you? Oh wells. Yani wants gummies. So I have to go Vivo again soon :]

I really want to move on. But now I'm doubtful about whether I'm gonna go back to what I was or I'm going to stay this way. LOL. I remembered before we got together you said "You better stay your straight way lah." hahaha. Yea, now I dont know if I can go back to my straight ways. But yea, there's quite a bit to take from this relationship I guess. If it weren't for you I wouldn't have bought that skirt and thus would never have found that its okay to wear short skirts. LOL. You taught me a few things I guess. Un-kukunise me. HAHA. Yes, this word is created by me for us. In remembrance I guess. So I really feel like its okay to close this chapter of my life now :) It's always gonna be fond memories I guess looking back on this relationship. Cos it's short but so much happened in the time we were together. haha. So yea, great friends we'll always be (: After all, your birthday is only 10 days after mine. HAHAHAHA! RANDOM! Yea. I cant believe you're older than me still. I always feel like you're younger. Because you're childish like anything. Well, we were great friends we'll be great friends. I know we can be.

I've been walking around
Inside a haze
Between the lines of reason
Hiding from the ghost
Of yesterday
Feels like I'm barely breathing

[Chorus:]
I-I wanna feel the rain again
I-I wanna feel the water on my skin
And let it all just wash away In a downpour
I wanna feel the rain
Na na na na
Feel the rain
Na na na na

I've been losin days
The shades pulled down
I still can't face the sun
But I-I'm goin crazy
I can't stay here
I've gone completely numb
I just wanna need someone

[Chorus:]
I-I wanna feel the rain again
I-I wanna feel the water on my skin
And let it all just wash away In a downpour
I wanna feel the rain
Na na na na
Feel the rain
Na na na na


Oh no
I thought you were the only one girl
But now I think I was wrong
Cause life goes on
Na na na na na...
I've been walking around inside a haze

Oh I...
[Chorus:]
I-I wanna feel the rain again
I-I wanna feel the water on my skin
And let it all just wash away In a downpour
I wanna feel the rain
Na na na na
Feel the rain
Na na na na


In a downpour feel the rain
Feel the rain

I wanna feel the rain

The damage has all been done. Let the hurt come and then the release and closure will come later I guess (: Feeling optimistic now. 2 more weeks, make it happy!


{ fin }