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{ Dreamer }
Definition:

1. a person who dreams.

2. a person who lives in a world of fantasy; one who is impractical and unrealistic.

3. a person whose ideas or projects are considered audacious or highly speculative; visionary.
{ Marianne }

The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.
It was always you.

{ Past. }

January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 December 2011 January 2012 February 2012 March 2012 April 2012 May 2012 July 2012 October 2012 January 2013 March 2013 July 2013 August 2013 January 2014 September 2014 January 2015 July 2015

{ Saturday, June 28, 2008 }

Today's post is about losing. Losing things important in life or even losing something bad in your life. It's all about losing.

I've lost a post yesterday. Losing a post isn't the heart of the matter. I've lost many posts before. Last night was my first night alone at home. It wasn't great or anything. I was online talking to Kenn and Leroy till 3+am. That also means, I lost sleep. Sleep that seemed so important to me. I lost it. I slept at 4+am.

Went for dinner with Sam, HM, Jem and his gf Wei Wei. It was an okay dinner. I see that Sam and James are _______________. But yea, its anothersad thing. Seems like friendship is near to being lost. Meeting them all again also proves how time causes us to lose the closeness of a group we used to have. Everything and everyone has changed somehow.





Today has been a weird day. My second day at home alone. Met Anuty Serene, Uncle Mike, grandma, grandpa and Getzel. They brought me to Jack's place!! OMG (: Yummy. I lost hunger. I seirously lost hunger for a few hours. Most importantly, I lost thought about you. I lost awareness that I was in causeway point. I went to kiddy palace with little Getzel. He's such a cutie. We soon went home. But before that my aunty asked if I'm still in contact with you. I dont know why. They keep binging you up. I lost the ability to block you out from my mind. I lost the ability to not think of things. I lost the courage to meet you and the fear crept in once again. I dont wanna see you anymore. I'm just not that strong.

So I came home and I lost the rest of the day to movies and the internet. I think Kite Runner is an amazing book. People should read it. And the should watch it too. It was made into a movie last year. It speaks about friendship, loyalty, and even touches on politics and the heirachy of things. It is one of the most amazing books of all time that brings out all sorts of emotions in people. Another good movie to watch is Lie With Me but only for thse of age XD Sexual content. It stars the girl who acted as Lara in The L Word. It is a movie about two people who randomly meet and at first have nothing but physical contact but soon realise that they've fallen in love with each other. What hits me in this movie is that it really brings out the feeling that someone gets when they truly love another and dont wanna be with anyone else besides that person. Lovely.

SIEWYI, I'M STILL MISSING YOU LIKE MAAAAD! JUST WANNA SAY I LOE YOU AND THANKS FOR ALL THE PIKACHU STUFF YOU DID (: SHOWS ME THAT YOU'RE THINKING OF ME EVEN WHEN YOU'RE AWAY. LOVE YOU LOADS WOMAN. COME BACK TO ME SOON :D

So today has made me realise that losing may not always be a bad thing. Not always. But most of the time is. Losing. Another thing, I feel like I'm losing everything I've thought to be good in my life. I wont explain this. I just feel like things have changed over the holidays. Everything feels different somehow. Am I the one who's changed? I really dont know. One last thing I'm losing, self confidence. There's so many things happening that's good but I keep telling myself its not to me. Its complicated and I cant seem to put to words what I'm feeling. I just feel lost, perhaps. Losing faith in everything.

You say you wander your own land
But when I think about it
I don't see how you can
You're aching, you're breaking
And I can see the pain in your eyes
Says everybody's changing
And I don't know why

So little time
Try to understand that I'm
Trying to make a move just to stay in the game
I try to stay awake and remember my name
But everybody's changing
And I don't feel the same

You're gone from here
And soon you will disappear
Cause everybody's changing
And I don't feel right

So little time
Try to understand that I'm
Trying to make a move just to stay in the game
I try to stay awake and remember my name
But everybody's changing
And I don't feel the same

So little time
Try to understand that I'm
Trying to make a move just to stay in the game
I try to stay awake and remember my name
But everybody's changing
And I don't feel the same

You cant lose what you never had. I'm learning.


{ fin }