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{ Dreamer }
Definition:

1. a person who dreams.

2. a person who lives in a world of fantasy; one who is impractical and unrealistic.

3. a person whose ideas or projects are considered audacious or highly speculative; visionary.
{ Marianne }

The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.
It was always you.

{ Past. }

January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 December 2011 January 2012 February 2012 March 2012 April 2012 May 2012 July 2012 October 2012 January 2013 March 2013 July 2013 August 2013 January 2014 September 2014 January 2015 July 2015

{ Friday, December 16, 2011 }

Today's the first time in this whole relationship where my negative feelings get in the way of me just going along with the flow.

I'm sorry but I can't stop my brain from working and it didn't stop. Not even the apologies and the nice words did anything to change it. And I really could have sworn that meeting him would make everything better.

I'm afraid. Afraid that my brain fucked things up. I just have a million thoughts running through my mind when I saw him tonight. I know without a doubt that I love him but something's not right and I think I know what it is. I feel like if I say anything this whole nice amazing relationship would turn out to be a facade, a smoke screen I made for myself.

And all these thoughts, I don't know how to even explain it to anyone. Its killing me. These thoughts are wearing me out, pulling me down. Drowning me. And once again, I'm watching myself sink. Watching myself ruin the one thing that I had full faith in.

Tell me how fucked up I am.


{ fin }